Doomsday

Well, at least, I didn't get to hear the verdict on the exact date of my first year of employment.

My position was declared redundant. That's what the papers say. Client demands have gone down. A lot of resources were in bench. I was one of them. They need to keep the career pyramid in its proper balance. Business needs, as they reiterated.

There were a few documents presented before me. The HR representative gave me time to fully understand everything that was written. I just stared at it blankly. I was, in fact, reading the words written on the documents but none of them registered on my mind. My mind was processing double-time. Trying to get some answers to questions and planning for the future all at the same time. Still at the end of it, I had no other choice but to sign the release papers. The decision was final.

Soon after, I was returning my badge and company ID. The only thing left was the Avanade ID lace. A bitter-sweet remembrance. Later on, my access was disabled. I became an incognito as the day went to an end.

To grasp everything that transpired was really hard. It was torture. I cried. Big time. I never thought this would happen. It is just so unfortunate that I won't be able to materialize whatever dreams I have of making it big in this company.

I wish to retract what I have written in my blog yesterday. There would be no need for me to look forward to another year. All of them would now be considered as "what-might-have-beens" and "what-could-have-beens".

On the other side, my year in the company has taught me a lot of things: it inspired me to push myself further, i have done things which I never thought I would, I made a couple of good friends, and had the fondest of memories.

I will carry all these things with me along with the hope that I will be better in time.